The stars really were fucking amazing.
My hands were glued to the windshield and I couldn't peel my eyes way, not even for a second. I didn't think I'd ever been so full of bliss. How can something so black and lifeless be so beautiful? The amount of stars was endless and stretched as far as the eye can see, and much, much farther.
Space could make you feel so invincible and yet so insignificant. There I was in a never ending mass of dark matter, stars and a billion unknown things that could be within this overwhelming mass of mystery we call the universe. What was I to this unexplainable sea of darkness? Nothing. I served no purpose in space and space didn't need my existence to help it in anyway.
All I could do was become transfixed by the marvellous stars that twinkled like diamonds through the ominous black.
I stared at space in utter awe for about 2 hours. My neck was killing me from looking up through the windshield for so long.
"You're really enjoying this, Dib." Zim spoke for the first time, his voice low but soft.
Still looking up I replied "It's so...beautiful."
"You don't have stare up like that..." Zim said while he began massaging my neck. I stiffened for a second but relaxed soon after, sighing heavenly to myself.
"Zim...you are the greatest friend I've ever had." I told him and I didn't really know why I said it all of a sudden. I was on the verge of tearing up and I really hopped Zim wouldn't freak out if I did cry. They would be tears of joy.
Zim's hand trailed down my back and I felt a shiver run up my spine. I'm not used to Zim...touching me...why was he so touchy now? I didn't mind it though.
"Silly, Dib, I'm your only friend." He reminded me as he began to slowly rubbing my back. I noticed that Zim was looking at me with those magenta eyes.
"I know..." I said softly. "but still...thanks" I looked at him and gave him a little smile. Zim looked down to the floor of the cruiser like he did last time I thanked him. I started to panic a little. Did I say too much!? Am I freaking him out!? Maybe he was afraid to admit how much he disliked me...my heart sank.
"S-sorry..." I said quickly, trying to cover up the genuine fondness I felt for the alien. Could he tell that I like him more than a friend?
Zim looked up at me and stopped rubbing my back. When I glanced at him, he looked kind of confused. I wish I knew what was going on in that head of his. Would it hurt to know his thoughts or would they heal my pain somehow?
"Why are you apologizing?" Zim asked and suddenly, I turned my head to the other side. Shit! Shit! Why am I crying now!? Stop! I screamed in my head. I felt that uncomfortable tinkling in my nose that you got when you were about to cry. I tried to avoid the sniffling that accompanied the shedding of tears. I wiped away the tears that had already made their way down my cheek ans I took deep breaths because that always helped me from balling my eyes out.
I felt Zim's hand on my shoulder. "Dib...? Is there a problem?" he asked, a bit concerned. I finished with the last of my fallen tears and took another deep breath and faced Zim, with a smile.
"Nope, no problem here." I said as happy as I could.
Zim looked at me for a minute, like he was searching for something. I managed to cover up the fact that I had just cried and I didn't want Zim finding out I did.
"Are you...lying to Zim?" he said slyly, as if it would make me confess but I needed to keep my pride. I had a right to keep things from the alien...it was better for the both of us...Zim more than me though.
"What's there to lie about?" I laughed half-heartedly. I wasn't really lying, just not telling him something...yeah.
Zim looked at me suspiciously. "I just thought that...nevermind." he said, quickly interrupted himself with a shake of his head. I'm glad he decided to just drop it.
Zim turned to the side, looking for Gir. Gir was sleeping soundlessly on the hard metallic floor. I was surprised he wasn't flipping out for no reason but I was thankful for it.
Me and Zim sat there in the little space the chair provided and Zim was idly skimming through things on the touch screen and I decided to actually look at the voot cruiser. I was too hyped for star glazing that I didn't pay much attention to the alien machinery.
I'd been in Zim's voot cruiser before and I'd also had Tak's old ship but this one was a little different. There seemed to be more room. The interior design was different as well, from what I remember; this one was more intricate and advanced. New almost.
"Zim, did you design this voot cruiser yourself? it's different than the last time I've been in here." Another thing I noticed about this voot cruiser that was quite significant was the touch screen monitor. The last one had tons of buttons.
"You haven't been in my voot cruiser in a really long time...since that stupid Tak incident. But I will say that it is new. You like?" He tilted his head to the side and smirked.
I looked around more. "Yeah..I mean...there's a lot more space in there than last time."
"Mmm, the seat can even adjust into a bed." he said in a seductive voice. I didn't know Zim could convey such a tone! My eyes went wide and my face was undoubtedly red with embarrassment. Of course I knew Zim was joking but hearing Zim's suggestive voice turned me on a little.
"What are you implying, alien?" I gave him a dirty but playful look. I wondered in the back of my head if Zim was at all aroused by the thought of doing it in space. What a stupid thought I told myself.
"Zim is implying that you can sleep if you are tired, Dib-worm." he said pressing some buttons. A little beep was heard and the seat began to vibrate. I jumped at the sudden movements as Zim simply got off the seat. We still had to crouch a bit since the voot cruiser wasn't as tall as it was wide. I watched as the chair transformed into a miniature couch. It reminded me of a bunk bed and how the bottom half could adjust into a little couch. But I noticed something and I gave the bed/couch a confused look. Zim saw my look and asked "Something wrong Dib-thing?"
"Uh, well...it's more of a couch than a bed..." I pondered how the hell I was supposed to lay on it without taking up all the room. Zim had to sit too.
"The cruiser is designed for one traveller. On long trips the pilot can put the cruiser on auto pilot and take a rest." He looked at me. "Irkens don't sleep for many hours such as humans but we get bored in space so naps are the best way to pass the time..." he told me. For some reason I envied Irkens for not needing vast amounts of sleep. I love sleeping but I tend to get sleepy at the worst times. Like when I should be doing homework or something important.
"Oh...so what about when there are two passengers?" I asked. Zim went to sit back down and looked to the screen.
"We can improvise." he said. I looked at him before sitting down again and Zim continued to talk. "There's more room but you have a few options..." he looked at me. "You can curl up into a ball...or lay your smelly human legs over mine..." I flinched a little at the last option. I think Zim liked it when he embarrassed me cause then he suggested something very more embarrassing.
"Or...you could always lay your giant head on Zim's lap." he said as he leaned back to point out the 'empty' space above his lap. "It's your choice, earth-child." I stared at that lap...very tempting. I gulped.
"I-I won't really need to sleep...right? I mean, aren't we going home soon..." I looked up at Zim with a nervous smile but Zim didn't return the smile, he stared at me then turned his head to the monitor. Did I insult him?
"It won't be for a while till we land..." he almost whispered.
"Oh..." I wanted to ask more but I couldn't bring myself to do it, it seemed to bug Zim and I didn't know why but I went against it, for now. I looked into the stars again, I didn't mind staying in space for a while longer. I looked back at Zim and was surprised to find him staring back.
"What?" I asked. It was a little weird seeing the back of the voot cruiser now. Before the seat was in a chair formation so I couldn't see the back.
"If you ever need to...you know...dispose of your disgusting human waste...you'll have to do it...outside." Zim told me this with caution.
I almost feel off the couch. "WHAT!?" I yelled. I could hear Gir stirring in the background, please don't tell me I woke him up. Zim seemed a little pissed at my outburst because I saw his antennae go flat against his head.
"Why are you yelling, human!?" He hissed.
"I don't want to use the washroom in space!" I screeched. "That's insane! And very, very, very gross!"
"Well it's your fault for having to do such things." Zim said in his snooty tone of voice. It was the voice he used when he wanted to emphasize how superior his race was compared to mine. I hate when he did that.
"Cause I have total control over the nature of my kind." I said, rolling my eyes and crossing my arms and practically slammed my back against the couch. I was not impressed.
"No. You're just unlucky." said theoh so amazing alien I saw as a friend for some fucked up reason.
Before I could think, I blurted out my rage. "Yeah, well, fuck you too, Zim." I didn't know what the relevance of my response had to do with what Zim said but I said it anyways. The concept just irked me really bad, having to pee in such a beautiful place, area, atmosphere whatever you want to call it. I prayed to God I didn't have to do any of that while stuck in this ship. The thought made my entire body shiver in horror.
I heard Zim sigh heavily and continue to carry out the conversation. "If you need to 'go' just tell me...ok?"
I didn't say anything. It puzzled me. Why did Zim 'care' so much to make sure I told him I had to pee. I hoisted my knees to my chest and hugged them. I suddenly felt really bad for swearing at Zim...no matter how much I think he deserved it. I buried my face in my knees.
What was wrong with me?
After what felt like a good hour, I lifted my head because I heard noises in the back of the cruiser. I wanted to look but I kept my glaze forward in fear that my eyes might meet with Zim's.
I heard tiny tink, tink, tink noises going across the floor then there was the hiss of something, I assumed it was a door opening. Gir was up, that had to be it. I waited for the worst. Screaming, yelling, hyperness, the whole shebang of Gir.
"Gir!" I jumped a little at the yell from Zim. "What are you doing?" I looked at Zim from the corner of my eye and was relieved to found Zim's back twisted to the back of the ship.
There was some rummaging of stuff and then came Gir's response "Nothing." I laughed a little and Zim's antennae lowered a bit.
"Do not lie to your master, Gir." he said. I thought it was weird that Gir referred to Zim as his 'master' and how Zim referred himself to Gir as such as well.
"I just wanted a burrito." he said in a surprising low and casual voice. I tried to hide my laughter, Gir made Zim sound like a nagging mother.
"Then what is that in your arm?" Zim questioned. I finally looked behind the couch to saw Gir holding what seemed to be a book. Gir reads!? I thought. Gir gave us a wide grin and made his way around my side of the couch. He stopped at my feet and gave me this cute look. I lowered my feet to the floor and Gir climbed onto my lap. I looked at Zim and Zim gave Gir is trademark look. I looked back down at Gir, he was harking down his burrito.
After many slobbering noises, spit flying everywhere, and at one point I swear the robot was going to choke and die, Gir finally spoke.
"Read meh a story!" he yelled waving the book in my face and my eyes went wide.
"Uhh..." I said while Zim laughed. I glared at him then looked at the book. It had a cow jumping over a taco. I sighed.
"Alright...I guess I could read this." I took the book from his hands and he lay against my stomach as I placed the book in front of us and opened it to the first page. I began to read.
After the book was done, Gir jumped up and down when the ending was that the cow ate the taco. Gir was so happy he began to cry, I just sat there and waited. Zim was getting really annoyed. Gir stopped and ran to the back again. I slumped in my seat. Zim looked just as bored as I did; he was slouching in his seat too.
Simultaneously, we looked at each other and I got this sudden urge to kiss Zim. Maybe it was because of that lingering feeling of guilt I had for yelling at him. Zim actually looked tired. How long have we been in space?
"Are you tired?" I asked.
"Yeah..." he looked forward and sighed. Why is Zim so...sad?
"Are you ok?" I asked cautiously, I never know how Zim would react to personal questions. I heard Gir going through more things in the back.
"Huh...uh yeah." he said. I wanted to slide my fingers along his cheek, I wanted to make Zim feel better but I didn't know how. There was an empty feeling in my stomach; A yearning in my heart. What had this alien done to me? Why did I feel this way, there had to be something about Zim that made me...want him.
"Are you tired Dib?" Zim asked, still facing forwards.
I watched him close his eyes.
"Kinda..." I said and I looked down at his lap and remembered the offer Zim gave me. The thought made me twice as tired.
Zim got up and pressed a few buttons on the monitor. I looked up to see a little passage on the roof open up and out flopped something...before I knew it I was covered in that something...
It was a blanket.
I ripped my way through the blanket and gave Zim a stunned look and the alien smirked. I looked at the blanket and began to feel it, it was soft and cool. I brought the sheet up to my shoulders.
"Go to sleep, Dib-thing." Zim said.
I looked at Zim for a moment, trying to read his expression. Gir come out of that little room thing at the back and sat on the floor again, while eating some candy. I glanced at Zim and he sat up and just like I did with Gir, Zim patted his lap. I eyes almost popped out of my head. Zim looked at me when I didn't move.
"There are no pillows." he stated.
"But I..." I stopped. I was going to say I wasn't tired but I really was...
I made several looks from Zim's lap to Zim's face, not sure what to do. Finally, I took a deep breath and scooted a little so I could place my head nicely onto Zim's lap.
It was a little awkward I must admit, very strange as well. Zim's actions towards me lately had me thinking twice about what he told me on our way to his base. Remorse, mercy, sorrow...and definitely love; feelings that invaders didn't have. But wasn't it sorrow that I saw in Zim's eyes as he told me to sleep? Wasn't caring about someone a part of loving them? I didn't know...maybe it was just me making things up.
As I lay down on Zim's fairly cold lap and face the front, I suddenly feel three light talons slowly brush through my hair. I flinched a little then realized it was only Zim. It was nice having someone comb their hand through your hair. Zim could have been treating me like a dog for all I knew but I didn't care. My eyes fluttered shut and I slipped into a soundless sleep.